Couples don’t know what to expect when they seek sex therapy. Many couples fear talking about their intimate feelings about their sexual life. They worry that their partner may scorn or reject them. Fears about addressing sexual issues mount when the couple also exhibits communication problems. After all, it takes good communication skills and risk taking to enjoy a fulfilling sexual relationship.
Well, I’m not exactly sure. I discovered this word while using google analytics. People looking for sex therapy search for a “sexologist.” According to Wikipedia, “Sexology is the study of human sexuality, including human sexual interests, behaviors and functions. Topics of study include sexual development, sexual orientation, gender identity, sexual relationships, sexual activities, paraphilias, and atypical sexual interests.” Many of these topics comprise what I treat in my practice. However, people searching under this term may be looking for how they might enjoy better sexual lives rather than the most recent research on human sexuality.
I do believe that in couples counseling talking about your marital sexual interactions should be addressed. Very often, clients who have previously worked on their marriages have neglected to work on their sexual relationship. If your marital communication is poor it follows that your sexual life may also suffer.
In general, we view our sexual relationship as separate from other aspects of our marriage. However, they are intrinsically tied to each other. If, for example, we are always fighting with each other this most likely has a profound impact on the frequency of your sexual expression. Some couples have great makeup sex while others simply stop having sex when there is too much conflict. Maintaining a healthy sexual life enhances the strength of any marriage.
What does a healthy sexual life look like? Each partner defines what they believe a healthy sex life would include. For example, feeling gratified, expressing your needs and desires, talking about what you enjoy and what you don’t enjoy. These topics define what couples say they require to feel sexually complete. Also, being honest with your partner if there’s something that they do sexually that bothers you tell them, instead, share with them how they can sexually please you.
If you are looking for a “Sexologist” or more importantly someone who can help you with your sexual relationship don’t hesitate to call Dr. Barbara Goschi. She’s here to help. You can reach her by phone at (312) 595-1787 or email her at barbara@drgoschi.com.
Marsha M. Linehan, Ph.D. developed Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT) in 1970 to treat chronically suicidal patients. This comprehensive and evidence-based treatment approach primarily helps individuals who struggle with emotionalregulation, self-destructive behaviors, and difficulties in interpersonal relationships. DBT combines elements of cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) with concepts and techniques from various other therapeutic approaches.
DBT operates on the principle that individuals who experience intense emotions often have difficulty regulating and managing them effectively. This therapy aims to address heightened emotions by teaching individuals specific skills to improve emotional regulation, enhance interpersonal effectiveness, tolerate distress, and develop mindfulness.
DBT emphasizes the concept of dialectics, which involves finding a balance between acceptance and change. It acknowledges that while individuals may have difficulties that require adjustment, they also need acceptance and validation. DBT helps individuals recognize and change harmful behaviors while simultaneously fostering self-acceptance and self-compassion. Individual sessions typically focus on helping the person apply DBT skills to their specific challenges and behaviors.
DBT has been found to be effective in treating several conditions, including Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD), self-harming behaviors, suicidal tendencies, substance use disorders, eating disorders, and other emotional dysregulation issues. Trained therapists deliver DBT in a strutured and systematic manner. Suicidal and self-harming behaviors may require hospitalization rather than out-patient treatment.
Consulting with a mental health professional is recommended to determine the most suitable therapy approach for an individual's specific needs. At Greater Chicago Counseling Center our clinicians determine whether a DBT treatment modality is right for you.
